I have learned a whole new level of trust. I have learned the true meaning of an emotional roller coaster! Of one minute being just on the verge of losing or letting go of hope and the next minute being as high as a kite. The slightest bit of good news, the smallest bit of improvement lifting me up again. My memory seemingly being wiped clean of the un-important and minor details in life. The eternal and relational taking front row seats as they should have been all along... You see, I am not condoning living life based on emotion, but when someone close to you is in a coma and fighting for her life, you cannot, and should not shut down your emotions. You love deeply, therefore you feel deeply. Really, the journey is unexplainable, as is the comforting omnipotent presence of a loving Father who says, "I've got it all under control, just let go and trust Me!" And so, in the midst of trauma I have also been able to experience some of the most peacefull and hopeful moments and days of my life.
Jeremiah 29:11 For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the LORD, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.
In the past few weeks, there have been several times I have woken up with a start, just like Someone was nudging me, and instantly knowing that I had to pray for Mary! I know that God is using this experience to change me, and the way I look at life in general, the way I am beginning to truly understand the power of prayer. Fully realizing that God is completely able to heal someone without us mere human beings, and yet He loves to hear from us, He wants to involve us in the healing process, in the miracles He loves to perform...it's like a special love letter from God, telling us that our petitions really do matter. What I do matters... how I love matters... how I trust matters...how I respond matters... what I do in the midst of trauma matters.... to everything there is a purpose.
Taken from Ecclesiastes 3:
1 There is a time for everything,
and a season for every activity under the heavens:
2 a time to be born and a time to die,
a time to plant and a time to uproot,
3 a time to kill and a time to heal,
a time to tear down and a time to build,
4 a time to weep and a time to laugh,
a time to mourn and a time to dance,
5 a time to scatter stones and a time to gather them,
a time to embrace and a time to refrain from embracing,
6 a time to search and a time to give up,
a time to keep and a time to throw away,
7 a time to tear and a time to mend,
a time to be silent and a time to speak,
8 a time to love and a time to hate,
a time for war and a time for peace.
9 What do workers gain from their toil? 10 I have seen the burden God has laid on the human race. 11 He has made everything beautiful in its time. He has also set eternity in the human heart; yet[a] no one can fathom what God has done from beginning to end. 12 I know that there is nothing better for people than to be happy and to do good while they live. 13 That each of them may eat and drink, and find satisfaction in all their toil—this is the gift of God. 14 I know that everything God does will endure forever; nothing can be added to it and nothing taken from it. God does it so that people will fear him.
My prayer is that many lives will be touched through the miracle of life and the journey to healing that is ahead for Mary Elizabeth Nelson........all to the Glory of God!
